This post has nothing to do with Charlie Sheen. Therefore, if that was what you were hoping it was about, and are generally close-minded, you might not be interested anymore. That's sad because this post really is about something that I think deserves reading.
Exactly, it's about winning.
There have been two instances that have happened in my life very recently that relate to winning.
Yesterday, a Certain Little Sibling, who happened to be in a very bad way at that moment, was upset that they could not get another one of our siblings to go with them to the store to get something that was VERY IMPORTANT for school.
I offered to go instead.
"No! I want (Certain Other Sibling) to go with me!"
A few minutes of arguing later things are looking up.
But then, "I need $20 for the store!"
Earlier, said sibling had said the Dollar Store. therefore I wondered aloud, "You need $20 for the The Dollar Store?"
"No, I need to go to Walgreens now and I'll need more than $20!"
...argument again unsues...
A few more minutes later we're about to head out the door.
Me, "You can only spend that money on school and nothing else,"
Certain Little Sibling, "Wait I need my allowance,"
...Bigger argument ensues...
Several minutes later we somehow manage to pull up in the Wallgreens parking lot. The allowance argument has turned into a I need to buy some gum!!! argument.
I say ok, but only with your own money.
Certain Little Sibling, "What?! I don't have enough money. Why can't you help me out? It's just a little gum."
I break down. In anger and frustration.
"(Yell Certain Little Sibling's name!), First of all you are clearly just trying to think of something to argue about and that is why nothing is getting done! I am trying to help you out, and all you are doing is finding a way to complain! First, it was (Other Certain Sibling), then it was school, then it was your allowance, and now we are arguing over a STINKING. PACK. OF GUM! This is not about anything important, it is about you winning!"
She is silent.
"Alright (Certain Little Sibling), I will agree to help you out if you PROMISE that you are going to have a serious attitude check and drop all arguments from here on out. Promise?"
So we go into the store and things are going fine. Arguments forgotten.
Then we get to the candy isle.
Certain Little Sibling eyes a colorful patch of assorted candies, our eminent demise.
"Sissy, can I get the candy instead,"
I am shocked and then silent, weighing the situation at hand.
Me, "(Certain Little Sibling), do you realize that you just threw that huge fit over needing some gum, and now you are just dropping that to have candy instead?"
"Yes," Certain Little Sibling says sheepishly.
I look up in frusttration, "But no, really. Really! Do you realize that you just threw that HUGE fit because you HAD TO HAVE THAT GUM and now you want candy."
I pause once more.
"Ok," I say, "I'll tell you what, (Certain Little Sibling). I'll help you out, but I want you to do one thing for me. I want you to look me in the eye right now and say that you threw that huge fit for no reason and that you only did that to create an argument in the first place."
She looks at me and smiles, and I can't help but smile a bit too.
Because I know I've won.
(Certain Little Sibling) says it all, right there in the candy isle, even while some lady passes us by quietly. And then I say, "And...?"
"I'm sorry," says Certain Little Sibling.
The taste of victory is sweet on my tongue.
So I buy the candy, but not before making sure Certain Little Sibling cuts me a fair share.
So many arguments with (Certain Little Sibling) that I find myself in I try to come out on top, but said sibling is a fighter, and I am not. Said sibling may be as wrong as christmas colors in June, but I hafta say, I don't think I ever had that kind of fight in me when I was that age. Not that I support that behavior with parents/family (which for Certain Little Sibling is still a work in progress) but every now and again these arguments lead to positives. Like when I wrapped my arm around said sibling afterwards and talked about how this was a learning experience and that next time we found ourselves in a pointless fight, we would remember this fight, and hopefully be able to fix things sooner. Also save our blood pressure a bit too.
The Generationals; When They Fight, They Fight
In a second recent instance, Victoria Forester wrote The Girl Who Could Fly. You should read it, don't pay any attention to the fact that it's about a little girl or that it's a bit dated or that there's no kissing of boys or that it's even a little wierd. It's a really good book. I wish I had been a little more like Piper McCloud when I was younger. But Piper did remind me on occasion of Certain Little Sibling. She said,
"A person wants to believe in folks and trust in things, and when you can't, life doesn't seem worth living anymore. That's exactly how I felt. Like it was hopeless. But the more I got to pondering it, the more I figured that even if some folks are bad, there's others who aren't. So I reckon I just won't give up my flying for anyone ever again. I don't care what they tell me. There's just some things you gotta keep for yourself, no matter who asks you or how nice they're being. Then it doesn't make any difference if folks are good or bad 'cause they can't do anything to me if I won't let 'em. Know what I mean?"